"Give me a really good first line, 

something I can sink my teeth into, that just pulls me in and makes me want to read more. For me, a really great first line raises a question in my mind, or, better yet, two or three, where I just have to read the book to find out. 

A good first line gives me context about the story and lays a roadmap for where we're going."

Jennifer March Soloway
Senior Agent at the Andrea Brown Literary Agency
During an interview on the Writers with Wrinkles podcast

October 2023

Welcome! I'm so glad you stopped by.
I hope you find this collection of picture book first lines inspiring and motivational.

If you'd like your book included in a future collection, click here.

Elements of a great first line

Great Carrier Reef

words by Jessica Stremer, art by Gordy Wright
published by Holiday House
First line:  Once a floating city, where sailors scurried as planes launched into battle, the USS Oriskany completed hundreds of daring missions, earning the nickname, the Mighty-O.
Elements used: introduces the main character, engages multiple senses, starts in the middle of the action, and makes the reader wonder something.
Comp tags: NF, wartime ships, ocean reef

First Line Revision Journey

1ST LINE - GREAT CARRIER REEF

By Jessica Stremer and Gord Wright (illustrator)

Current: See entire first spread at the end

Once a floating city
Where sailors scurried
As planes launched into battle,
The USS Oriskany completed hundreds of daring missions,
Earning the nickname, “The Mighty O.”

1st Draft:

1950
      A steel giant rises up from the shipyard.
      Plate by plate.
      Bolt by bolt.

Jessica remembers: The USS Oriskany is the main character of the story, and with this version I introduced readers to the ship by starting with its construction. There was also a desire to evoke emotion to help readers connect with the ship. I wanted readers to see the USS Oriskany as strong and powerful so they would feel more passionately about its transformation. 

2nd Draft:

1950
      The USS Oriskany’s bow slices through the waves of the Pacific Ocean.
      Nicknamed the Mighty-O,
 Sailors scurry across the aircraft carrier’s flight deck
 as planes launch into the sky.

E e e e e e r r o o o o m!


Jessica remembers: In this version I started with the ship in action. I still tried to evoke emotion by using strong verbs like slices, while also including a bit about the ship’s purpose/mission. The “service” component comes into play again in the ending and ties into one of the themes of this book.

I received a revise and resubmit from the editor who would eventually acquire this manuscript. These were her comments for the opening spread:

“I wonder about the tense here. I think of the story as beginning after the Mighty-O has already finished its final mission. Should this portion be past tense? 


Changing the tense might also help situate the story. You don’t want readers to begin and think “Wait, is this a military history book?” If you open by establishing that the Mighty-O served the Navy rather than serves the Navy, that might help to make it clear that the book is about what happened next.”

She was right about changing the tense, and I still needed to introduce the USS Oriskany to the readers and show that the ship was retired from service before it began its transformation. Originally, I had 3 or 4 spreads only about the ship before ever getting to the why behind the Mighty-O’s transformation - coral reefs. Since this was a key component of the story (and I really wanted the R&R to be successful), I knew it was time to kill some darlings!



It took a few tries, but I was eventually able to condense everything I wanted to say about the ship’s history before its big transformation onto the opening spread. As a military spouse, it was important to me that the historical details from the USS Oriskany’s time in service be included. My editor agreed and together we found a home for those details in the back matter. 


Here’s the current opening spread:
 Once a floating city,
  where sailors scurried 

  as planes launched into battle,
the USS Oriskany completed
 hundreds of daring missions,
earning the nickname, the Mighty-O.

After years of battering by the salty sea,

the retired aircraft carrier seemed destined to sit forever chained to a pier.

Rusted, empty, without purpose.

But for the Mighty-O, 

a different fate was coming.

I was really happy with how the revisions turned out and obviously the editor was, too! We only ended up changing one word on that first spread after she acquired the manuscript. I think this opening is perfect because it succinctly introduces the ship, describes its purpose, conveys emotion, and sets the tone for the rest of the story. I hope readers will check out GREAT CARRIER REEF to see how the story progresses!

Rosa's Song

By Helena Ku Rhee and Pascal Campion

Published by Random House Studio

First line: Jae was new to the country, the city, the building.

Elements used: Introduces the main character, hints at the setting, and makes the reader wonder something

Comp tags: friendship, imagination, immigration, new language, transition

I Live in a Tree Trunk

Words by Meg Fleming, art by Brandom James Scott

Published by Harper

First line: I live in a tree trunk.

Elements used: hints at a unique premise

Comp tags: animal homes, rhyming, repeating refrain

Sloth Sleeps Over

By Blythe Russo

Published by Viking

First line: Sloth is invited to her very first sleepover!

Elements used: references something with universal appeal, and introduces the main character 

Comp tags: friendship, sleepovers

Why DID the Monster Cross the Road?

Words by R.L. Stine, art by Marc Brown

Published by Orchard Books

First line: Hunny and Funny are monsters.

Elements used: introduces the main characters and surprises the reader

Comp tags: monsters, friendship, humor, jokes

My Mom Is a Foreigner, but Not to Me

Words by Julianne Moore, art by Meilo So

Published by chronicle books

First line: My Mom is a foreigner; she’s from another place.

Elements used: surprises the reader, makes the reader wonder something, and establishes a rhythm that pulls the reader in

Comp tags: first-generation immigrant, EAL

Pig and Horse and the Something Scary

By Zoey Abbott

Published by Abrams Books for Young Readers

First line: One morning, Pig woke up feeling a bit out of sorts.

Elements used: hints at a universal theme and makes the reader wonder something

Comp tags: fears, worries, friendship

The Name Game

By Elizabeth Laird and Olivia Holden

Published by Tiny Owl

First line: It’s so boring at home.

Elements used: references the universal theme of boredom

Comp tags: anthropomorphism, fantasy, imagination

The Yellow Ao Dai

Words by Hanh Bui, art by Minnie Phan

Published by Feiwel and Friends

First line: It was the day before International Day at school, and Naliah couldn’t help but be a little nervous.

Elements used: Introduces the main character, establishes the setting of the story, and makes the reader wonder something and feel something

Comp tags: traditions, cultural clothing, mistakes, lessons, memories

Before, Now

By Daniel Salmieri

Published by Rocky Pond Books

First line: In the dark sky floats a bright planet

Elements used: sets the tone for the story and introduces the concept

Comp tags: opposites, circle of life

Princess Pru and the Ogre on the Hill

Words by Maureen Fergus, art by Danesh Mohiuddin

Published by Owlkids Books

First line: Princess Pru’s life was practically perfect.

Elements used: introduces the main character, uses poetic devices, and makes the reader wonder something

Comp tags: humor, rhyme, prejudice, stereotypes, courage, parties

Henrietta Hedgehog's Prickly Problem

Words by Carole P. Roman, art by Mateya Arkova

Published by Chelshire, Inc

First line: Henrietta Hedgehog rolled into a tight ball under her quilt.

Elements used: introduces the main character and makes the reader feel something

Comp tags: bullying, differences, acceptance, love for self

My Bollywood Dream

By Avani Dwivedi

Published by Candlewick Press

First line: Bollywood movies are made of dreams and adventures, and I long to discover them all.

Elements used: introduces the main character and their goal

Comp tags: Bollywood, dreams, Mumbai, imagination

The City Tree

Words by Shira Boss, art by Lorena Alvarez

Published by Clarion Books

First line: IN FRONT OF DANI’S BUILDING WAS A HOLE.

Elements used: introduces the main character, makes the reader wonder something, and uses unique formatting

Comp tags: lyrical, seasons

Gilly's Monster Trap

By Cyndi Marko

Published by Sion & Schuster Books for Young Readers

First line: Gilly was practically a fish.

Elements used: introduces the main character and hints at something with universal appeal

Comp tags: mystery, assumptions, fear, helping

The Together Tree

Words by Aisha Saeed, art by LeUyen Pham

Published by Salaam Reads

First line: Rumi joined Ms. Garza’s class on the first warm day of spring.

Elements used: introduces the main character, hints at the universal theme of starting a new school, and makes the reader feel something

Comp tags: bullying, friendship, moving

Flower Girl

Words by Amy Bloom, art by Jamella Wahlgren

Published by Norton Young Readers

First line: Nicki came downstairs one morning and checked out the world.

Elements used: introduces the main character

Comp tags: self love, individuality, gender expression, weddings, family

Wolfboy Is Scared

By Andy Harkness

Published by BLoomsbury Children’s Books

First line: Wolfboy was having so much fun.

Elements used: introduces an unusual main character and makes the reader wonder something.

Comp tags: Fear, adventure, surprises

Gustav Is Missing!

By Andrea Zuill

Published by Random House Studio

First line: Little Cap lived with his best friend, Gustav, in their cozy house.

Elements used: introduces an unusual main character and establishes the setting of the story

Comp tags: facing fears, adventure, friendship

The Fastest Tortoise in Town

Words by Howard Calvert, art by Karen Obuhanych

Published by Candlewick Press

First line: I’ve entered a running race.

Elements used: establishes the setting of the story

Comp tags: origin story, persistence, good attitude, trying new things

Simon and the Better Bone

Corey R. Tabor

Published by Balzer + Bray

First line: Simon was out playing by the pond when he found a bone.

Elements used: introduces the main character and makes the reader feel something

Comp tags: unusual structure, unusual premise, surprising the reader

The Boy Who Cried Poop

Words by Alessandra Requena, art by Guilherme Karsten

Published by Frances Lincoln Children’s Books

First line: The sun was bright adn hot on the first day of our vacation.

Elements used: references something with universal appeal and engages multiple senses

Comp tags:  humor, pooping, siblings, family, summer, swimming, accidents

Snake's BIG Mistake

By Sarah Kurpiel

Published by Greenwillow Books

First line: Snake set out to sculpt the best, most spectacular, positively greatest clay pot in art class.

Elements used: introduces the main character and their goal and establishes an unusual premise

Comp tags: friendship, taking undue credit, art class, apologizing, making things right

Let's Play Gonggi!

Words by Im Seo-Ha, art by Minjoo Kim

Published by Brown Books Kids

First line: “Good morning, partner!”

Elements used: makes the reader wonder something

Comp tags: games, competition, friendship

You Go First

Words by Ariel Bernstein, art by Marc Rosenthal

Published by Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers

First line: Cat and Duck, two very good friends, arrived at the playground.

Elements used: introduces the main characters and establishes the setting of the story

Comp tags: fear, anxiety, adventure, trying new things, friendship

The World Sleep Championship of Animals

By Daniel Napp

Published by Kane Miller

First line: Welcome to this year’s World Sleep Championship!

Elements used: engages the reader and introduces a unique premise

Comp tags: competition, sleep, animals

How to Ride a Dragonfly

Words by Kitty Donohoe, art by Anne Wilsdorf

Published by anne schwartz books

First line: If you want to ride a dragonfly, you have a problem—you are too big!

Elements used: engages the reader and introduces a unique premise

Comp tags: imagination, adventure, following rules

the knowing

Words by Ani Di Franco, art by Julia Mathew

Published by Rise

First line: I have a name and my name has a story

Elements used: makes the reader feel something

Comp tags: rhyme, empowerment, identity

Our Roof Is Blue

Words by Sara E. Echenique, art by Ashley Vargas

Published by Charlesbridge

First line: OUR ROOF IS BLUE, AZUL.

Elements used: introduces a unique premise

Comp tags: hurricanes, climate change, natural disasters, trauma, adventure, imagination, siblings

Grandpa Forgets

Words by Suzi Lewis-Barned, art by Sophie Elliot

Published by Windmill Books

First line: Grandpa forgets what he had for breakfast.

Elements used: Starts in the middle of the action and makes the reader wonder something and feel something

Comp tags: intergenerational relationships, dementia, hope

Little Black Hole

Words by Molly Webster, art by Alex Willmore

Published by Philomel

First line: There was once a little black hole who loved everything in the universe.

Elements used: introduces a unique main character

Comp tags: black holes, space, STEM, SEL

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